Wednesday, June 30, 2004

If you love me, Darling
Take an axe to my head
For I've grown world weary
And would rather be dead;

If you truly care, dearest,
Bash a bat to my skull,
'fore revulsion consumes me
And renders me dull;

A send-off of strychnine,
A hemlock farewell -
Simply kiss me good-evening
And let me to hell;

Or a bullet well nestled
In the flesh of my breast
To both slay and allay me,
Then send me to rest

I'm sickened with struggle,
Beset with life's strife,
And thus thirsty for mercy
At the tip of your knife.

But should you cease mourning,
And adore once more,
I'll return from the grave
And call you a whore.

Thursday, June 24, 2004

But those beautiful models . . . they . . . they don't exist! They aren't real!

Latest news:

Family to leave friday morning.

That is all.

I won't believe it, myself, until I see them pull out of the drive.

Tuesday, June 22, 2004

OH MY WORD. I CAN'T TAKE THEIR INDECISION ANYMORE! Looks like they ARE leaving . . . . tomorrow. check back for updates.

call 281.251.5488 to be sure or 713.992.2364 . . .

Gawd almighty . . . i wish they'd just make up their minds.

How to freak out two stoned guys sitting across the table from you in Denny's

In five easy steps:

1. without attracting anyone's attention, palm a miniature creamer container.

2. grab a sharp fork

3. hold creamer container, still palmed, over eye. To an observer, it should appear that you're simply putting your hand in front of your eye.

4. Say "HEY GUYS, WATCH THIS!!!"

5. Pierce the creamer container's lid with the sharp fork, allowing it's white, milky contents to drip down your face. Scream dramatically, as if you truely had enucleated yourself.

Guarenteed, you'll have them freaking out in no time.

Fucking family. They always fucking cop out on the best stuff . . .

They WERE going to leave on vacation for 6 days, leaving me alone in the house for the interum, but NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO - they go and cancel. On account of rain. Fuck.

Today I am God's ashtray.

Well, time to play Dance Dance Revolution for 3 hours and climb out the back window of reality. Excuse me . . .

Sunday, June 20, 2004

First ...

Job: Senior director of mayhem, mistress-for-hire, royal bitch, and party girl. (aren't i well rounded?)
Screen name: Childofmists
Pet: a cat named Paris. She was black and loveable
Piercing: two earings when i was a newborn babe
Tattoo: jail-house style knife tat on my left foot I put in when i was young. it says "life" in runic letters
Credit card: Visa printed with VanGogh's Starry Night
Kiss: Joe Schaffer - a cute little blond idiot in Utah
Best friend: J.J. Orton. I was in love with her for five years.
Wedding: i know i've been to one, i just don't remember whose . . .

Last ...

Car ride: mom and dad's bigass conversion van. back seat.
Kiss: Mumsy
Movie watched: Troy. Freaking rocked my sox.
Beverage drank: Water, diet coke, tea, coffee. that's all i drink.
Food consumed: steamed vegetables and a persimmon
Phone call: Shadi called me from the bus to panama city. How sweet
Road trip: who cares. I LOATHE the car for long distances.
Time showered: 5.15 pm, after ddring for 2 hours
CD played: The Teaches of Peaches. Golly she's nice and vulgar
Time you cooked from scratch: too long ago
Time you cut your toenails: weeks and weeks ago. i like them long and filed into smooth shapes.

Now ...

Single or Taken: i'm in love
Sex: femme fatale
Birthday: oct 31
Sign: Scorpio
Siblings: 1 sister, 2 brothers, all younger.
Hair color: blue, indigo, purple, and violet
Eye color: brown
Shoe size: 8
Height: 5'2"
Wearing: nothing. Well, ok, a thong and some body jewelry. Come on, it's 2 am. must i dress for you freaks?
Drinking: maple vanilla tea
Thinking about: sex, clubbing, my novel, my blog, a man i love who is currently at a great distance from me, and sex.
Listening to: Dirty Vegas, followed by a little Crystal Method and Delerium

This song hits home a little too well.

"Days Go By" - Dirty Vegas

You
You

You are still a whisper on my lips
A feeling at my fingertips
That's pulling at my skin

You leave me when I'm at my worst
Feeling as if I've been cursed
Bitter cold within

Days go by and still I think of you
Days when I couldn't live my life without you
Days go by and still I think of you
Days when I couldn't live my life without you
Without you
Without you

You know who you are.

False alarm, kids. I'm NOT leaving for summer session of college. We don't have enough money. Looks like you're all stuck with me until August 18th.

Oh the irony . . .

I love persimmons - sweet, jelly-like, golden colored asian fruits. Love love LOOOVE 'em. Unfortunately, they're a delicacy, sold for about a dollar each during 4 weeks out of the year. Who wants to pay that much for fruit? I mean really, a dollar per 'simmon?

So what I did, gentle readers, is switch out the persimmon stickers with stickers for seemingly cheaper organic tomatoes. In my experience, the cashiers at HEB are noodle-brains and could never tell the difference.

But you see, gentle readers, what I didn't know was that the price for organic tomatos (listed per pound) turned out to be about the same as persimmons.

I saved an earth-shattering 3 cents.

Goddamn my lack of math skills!

Saturday, June 19, 2004

School's out for a few weeks, and that is it - we all start disappearing, one by one. Friendships fall into extinction, left and right. Behind me lies stagnicity, before me, chaos. Goddamn these transitional weeks. I long to retreat into the dim hells of Klein High School once again, if only to face a known enemy rather than the faceless abyss of college, of autonomy, of St. Louis. Without my social network, I fear the city will swallow me whole.

The moral acceptibility of an act is inversely proportional to how much sensual pleasure it can potentially inflict upon the participant.

My new concept of heaven on earth is spinning blue electric glowstick poi in the park at 4am with a handsome guitarist on my left and a winsome soprano on my right. We loitered deliciously - alyssa, mark, and I - until dawn. There are some moments that deserve to last forever.

I'm leaving this town sooner than expected. July 19th is the first day of late summer session. Sorry kids, I need to boot some prerequisites or there's no way i'll graduate on time. Back to the grindstone for me . . . but everyone knows that's how I like it. My career comes first.

If it weren't for AIM, I don't think I'd believe that long distance friendships and romances could be possible. No one has the attention span to write a letter anymore.

Tuesday, June 15, 2004

Today I had the strangest sensation - it seemed that everyone around me was nothing more than a figment of my imagination, created to fill-in a fictional cene from the recesses of my brain. My world ceased to be real. Everything was shrouded in plasic, infused with cartoon colors, distant and sterile, mechanical, contrived. In a room full of people, I sat alone. My actions seemed to orginate from an intelligence beyond my own psyche. My nerves seemed like they were made of sugar syrup and play doh. The feeling stayed with me all evening, and even into the night. Am I dreaming?

My life is rated NC-17.
What is your life rated?

Sunday, June 13, 2004

Sometimes I almost wished I lived in a dystopia a la Aldous Huxley; I could accept with certainty my preassigned place in a calculated society while mechanically obtending every unpleasant emotion with governmentally dispensed soma. Imagine for a moment, gentle readers, how much easier that would be. What a relief!

Saturday, June 12, 2004

Today I traveled up to the Woodlands to visit my friend Alyssa. She wins my favor twofold: firstly for her intelligence; secondly for her churlish audacity. Oh how I relish her capers! Why, just this afternoon, on a dare, she faked a noisy orgasm in the middle of starbucks. How temptingly DARING!

Golly I love clovies.

ROMANCE:
MrLiftKit: I can't help it, I like the way you grab my as
MrLiftKit: azzz
MrLiftKit: buttocks!
SexyLexus773: tis a nice piece of it
SexyLexus773: grade A
SexyLexus773: A for ASSSSSSSS
MrLiftKit: I am a winner

Friday, June 11, 2004

Well, well, well. Look who's back from the great land of the north. In case you hadn't heard, gentle readers, I recently took a week's vacation in Toronto - and had the time of my life! I shopped, partied, explored the city, made friends, collected enough material to write for years, and have plans to return again soon. Ask me for details if you really care. I'm too lazy and secretive to type them out.

My return home hasn't been so bad, just catching up with people after my absence, and yet i feel out of place. An undefinable force is slowly phasing me out of this high school incarnation, forcing me into extraneousity even amidst so much familiarity.

To quote the bard (well . . . it's Cibo Matto):

Gotta get out, to get out, the hell out,
Gotta get out, to get out, the hell out,
Gotta get out, to get out, the hell out,
Gotta get me out of here before I go stale.

Tuesday, June 01, 2004

PARTY AT MY HAUS!

Today, June 1st, 7-11pm
@6915 Wimbledon Estates DR

*Bring your swimsuit/towel if you'd like to take a dip
*DDR and karaoke will be available
*DJ on staff ^_^
*Yes, food will be provided. What do you take me for?
*Word to your mother.

OPEN INVITATION. If you can read this, you can come. Bring friends, lovers, dentists, siblings, ANYONE.

And oh yeah, SUBSTANCE FREE.

Theoretically, a slab of lard wrapped with strips of bacon fits into your low-carb dieting plan. Now there's food for thought.

I love anyone who can make me giggle. It's such a rare occurance - for me to laugh with abandon, without malevolence or spite - that I can't ignore the feat's significance. The sensation of true laughter fills me, soothing the psychic vacancies of a life misdirected.

"Gravity is for PUSSIES." --- Zane Johnsen

I'd rather have parents who are too distant, than parents who are crushingly overbearing and stringent.

shiny objects