The City's Supple Underbelly
or
Excuse Me, Have You Seen My Small Intestine?
You know, I've seen more of Houston since I moved to Killeen than I did in the four years I spent living in Houston itself. Go figure.
Recent Attractions:
MAI'S - Vietnamese restraunt. Pretty damned good vegetarian spring rolls. I'd never eaten Vietnamese before, but it's a new favorite. Apparently the place is open until 3am, which makes it a plus for my fellow crazy club kids. There's a feng-shui friendly mirror all the way around the dining area, perfect for catching dorky hipsters staring at my luscious ass. Zack and his rebel buddies used to slum around this joint until the wee-hours, wreaking mayhem on unsuspecting patrons. Tip generously.
BODY WORLDS III - Two words, gentle readers: motherfucking cadavers. Someone (anatamist Gunther von Hagen) loved the silent poetry of the human carcass so much, that he invented a way to preserve it forever in a thin, yet durable, plastic coating. And thus "plastinization," as the process is called, elevated man to medium, autopsy to high art. Body Worlds features an onslaught of plastinized human sculptures just dying (hah. HAHAHA. HEEEE!) to teach you the private beauty of their abdominal cavity. NNnngg. Yeeeahhah. My favorite displays included a flayed figure contemplatively clutching his own hide, a brain with alzheimer's disease, and a horseman riding a plasticized steed straight from the floppy bowels of hell.
XXX MEGAPLAZA - Believe it or not, my first adult video store. Zack and I perused the shelves for some time, but couldn't agree on a single DVD. My picks: Lord of the Strings, Mistress C.M. Hurt (too much CBT for the Zackinator), Tranny Trouble 7 (need I say more?). His picks: Harry Twatter (I prefer bald), Ultimate Squirt 4 (featuring Thai amateur Seemi Pi), and I Cream of Jeanie. Finally, we comprimised on the Anal Adventure 3000, and called it a night. It's for a friend. Really.
NUMBERS NIGHTCLUB - Everything you hear about it is true. It's rather beat up. The sound system is so-so. The crowd couldn't get more mixed if it were a government sponsored random sample. And you know what? I really liked it. I'm going back. Last night was 80's night; Zack and I swung mad glowsticks to the songs we like to pretend we grew up to. There's nothing better for gleaning mass attention than rhythmically spinning Army-issued Chem Lights around your head on the stage of a pitch-black club. Hot damn, I never want to grow old.
TTFN. I love this city more than you. I'm off to a strip club, tonight!
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